The Real Dream is to Make a World

Dear Still Harbor Community,

I hope that you are all settling in to the rhythms of this year, especially as we approach the shifting sunlight and the turning of seasons once again. 

Like I assume many of you did, I tried my hardest to meet this new year with excitement and ambition, only to realize what I needed was more rest, more space, and an invitation to tend to my imagination. 

So, I slowed down and turned to fiction to accompany the new year. Specifically, I turned to The Gilda Stories by Jewelle Gomez. Originally published in 1991, Gomez’s novel is a delightful, sometimes scary, tale of a Black queer vampire and her journey of love, loss, and survival across time and space. And as I journeyed with Gilda, I found something I didn’t anticipate. Right before Gilda is turned into a vampire, the woman who turned her says “My dream was to see the world, over time. The real dream is to make a world–to see the people and still want to make a world.” When I tell you, I immediately underlined, transcribed, and plastered that quote all over my apartment so I could read it everyday. So I could just sit with the truth encapsulated in that dream that we are co-creators with this world we live in. 

That dream is at the heart of my vocation as a spiritual director rooted in collective liberation. To accompany people and see the full complexity of their lived experiences–their heartbreak, strength, joy, and grief. To accompany this world as white supremacy continues to terrorize and transphobic legislation is on the rise is hard. To witness it all is hard. To still hold on to the dream to make a world that is just, empowering, and makes all our lives livable sometimes feels impossible.  

And yet, sometimes you open a book and a lesbian vampire reminds you of your dream. She reminds you that a dream like yours–one that co-creates a world and makes lives livable, even for an almost immortal vampire–is worthy to hold on to even when the world is hard. 

With Gratitude,

Nathan Bakken (they/them)

Still Harbor Co-Director, Director of Community Engagement